Fish in a Net
by xXAlissaAmaranthXx
Summary: Nnoitra just wanted to get his well-deserved payback, So why the heck is this being turned around on him? Nnoitra love story, rated for Language, Nnoitra sexist pig-ness, and citrus fruits. Nnoitra x OC
1. Chapter 1

Name: Mari~ meaning rebelliousness (I thought it was fitting!)

I DONT OWN BLEACH! I mean really? Whats the point of this? if i owned it i wouldnt write friggin fanfiction!

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Cackling like a maniac I continued my mad spree through the halls of las noches, Nnoitra sprinting after me like a madman, features twisted in anger, neon orange hair fluttering behind him.

"YOU'VE GONE TOO FUCKIN FAR THIS TIME BITCH!" He howled. I ran faster. Yeah, I was probably gonna pay for this one… but Kami dammit he started it! Well… at least I think he did… wait… did he?

We'd been doing this for so long it seemed I couldn't even remember who pissed who off first… ever since I was 'born' into las noches, Nnoitra and I had been at each other throats, taking it in turn to prank, trap, swear at, and generally fuck with each other's heads. We hated each other's guts with all the fiery passions of the hounds of hell. Every morning when I got out of bed, the first thing I had to do was check my rooms for traps, before I could even get out of bed. The major difference between our play was, while mine were more like pranks (dying all his jackets pink, putting dye in his shampoo bottle, taking rainbow sharpies to his scythey thresher things…) his retaliations were more… painful.

A couple of them could easily have been fatal. I had once woken up to find a set of knives dangling over my bed inches from my face, and another time he had pumped my room full of gas so when I lit one of my many candles it would have exploded. Luckily, I managed to detect them every time, due to my awesome skills of ninja-ness, so I was never really worried. Still, it seemed a bit overkill till I figured out what he was really mad about. It wasn't the pranks per se, it was the fact that his humiliation was brought about by _me. _Me being a woman, one of the worthless creatures so looked down upon by him.

Even though I was one of his mere 2 fraccion, I was worthless in his eyes. I was just barely below espada level, in fact, if two or three kicked the bucket I was pretty sure I was in line, but still, I was just a woman. Still I was just the bitch he _barely _put up with. The only person who truly knew how much that hurt me was Tesla, my best friend and fellow idiot. You had to be an idiot to serve Nnoitra, even if you were totally, moronically, and inconceivably in love with him like I was. Yep. I said it. And all my pranks were just attempts to get him to look at me for a few minutes. I couldn't help it! He was strong, he was funny, his reactions made me laugh my ass off, and, once you got past the creepy leer, he was kinda cute! What's not to like? Okay wait… don't answer that… I know the answer.

ANYWAY! On this particularly lovely morning, I had snuck into Nnoitra's room while he was sleeping and poured highlighter orange dye into his shampoo bottle. It was good stuff too, Szayel made it special for me. Szayel and I had a kind if agreement. As long as I made Nnoitra miserable, and kept his name out of it, he would help me with the more interesting supplies for my little 'gifts.' Szayel liked me quite a bit, and disliked Nnoitra just as much as everyone else in las noches, so it wasn't very hard to convince him…

And now Nnoitra was a carrot top and he was damn pissed about it. I skidded around the corner and broke into my mad dash once again. YES! I could see the door to my room, just... a little… further… Ha! Nnoitra's footsteps began to close in as I yanked open my door and bolted through, whirling to lock i- "AAAHHH!" suddenly, the ground was very, very far away.

I heard cackling as a grinning Nnoitra stepped into my room. "Mari? Mari? Now where oh where could the little bitch have gone?" He laughed again and looked up, "Oh there you are! All gift wrapped and hand fuckin delivered too! Oh this is great!"

I glared daggers at his grinning face as I struggled to get my face right side up. My arm slipped through the squares of rope that bound me, and I swore. Yeah that's right. Rope. At the moment, Nnoitra was probably seeing a pretty funny picture. I was trapped in some kind of giant net, and since I had been running when it sprung, I was in a pretty awkward position. One of my legs were twisted up through an upper loop, and the other was stuck through the bottom. By reflex I had tried to cathch myself, and so my arms were stuck through behind me. Oh yeah, and I was upside down.

This was so fucking undignified. "NNOITRA!" I screeched "The moment I get out of this I'm gonna rip your nuts off and feed them to a squirrel!" Nnoitra just grinned wider, "Now who said you're gonna get out of this?" He taunted. I stared at him, and then laughed, "Like hell! You can't keep me here forever! I'm ten feet off the ground!"

Nnoitra grinned even wider, it looked like his face was gonna split it was that wide. "Can't I?" He reached behind my door and pulled something out. It was a pole. A metal one. It was about eight feet long, and had a y-shape on one end. I stared at it, not getting it.

"What the hell are you gonna do with… OH MY KAMI!" I shrieked. Nnoitra lifted the pole to the top of the net, and stuck the y-shaped part into the place where the net drew together and lifted, and suddenly I was hanging from the pole and not the ceiling. He lowered me slowly, and brought me to his eye-level. (Note: that STILL made me pretty far off the ground!) He leered at me. "Now what was that about not being able to keep you there?"

I stared at him incredulously. "What the hell? Are you just gonna carry me through the halls like this?"

"Fuck yeah!"

That was it. I started struggling. I tried tearing the rope. I tried untying it. Hell, I even tried firing a cero at the damn thing. Nnoitra just watched in amusement. "What the hell is this shit made of?" I whined.

"Hell if I know, but it's straight from Szayel's labs. You can't burn it, cut it, stretch it, tear it or anything else you can think of.

Okay, I'll admit. I was getting pretty worried here. He had obviously thought this it out. That in itself was a small miracle. Nnoitra didn't think things out. Nnoitra barreled into things headfirst screaming, swearing, and swinging his scythes. But this… the net, the pole, the schmancy rope…

"Oh Kami." I groaned, "You're fucking serious."

And he was. All that day he carried me around, kicking and struggling, from Szayel's lab to fix his hair (Szayel gave me a sympathetic look, but Nnoitra _is_ technically a higher rank than him sooooooooo...) to the sparring grounds. (Where I was hung from a streetlight like some kinda weird lamp!). I was slung over his shoulder from the pole, dangling a few feet behind him like those sacks hoboes always carry in old cartoons. You shoulda seen the looks we got. The worst by far, was when we ran into Grimmjow. He just froze there, in the middle of the hallway. Nnoitra was grinning at him like the nutcase he was. Grimmjow blinked a few times, and then suddenly just burst out laughing. I swear to Kami, the man was bent over double just howling with laughter, tears in the corners of his eyes. I gave him the glare of doom the entire time. When he finally stopped laugh enough to choke out a few words, he looked at Nnoitra and said:

"Finally putting your bitch in her place Nnoitra?"

I roared at him, and lunged at him through the net, tipping over. Nnoitra had to scramble to catch me, but I still banged against the wall painfully. "Owie!" I whimpered. I reached my hands through the net and rubbed my sore butt, as they BOTH started laughing at me. Oh yeah, today was easily the worst day of my life.

"Um, Nnoitra-sama?" I whined. Yeah Sama. I had given up on the swearing and struggling. Now I hoped if I was the good little fraccion like Tesla that maybe he would put me down. So far I had no such luck.

Nnoitra looked up at me. He was grinning of course. He hadn't stopped all fucking day. "Yeah Mari-chan?"

I took a deep breath, "Yeeeeeeeeeeaaaah…. How the hell am I supposed to sleep?"  
Nnoitra didn't seem fazed by the question that had been bugging me for hours. He just started down the corridor toward… wait. This was the west wing, the place reserved for the residence of the espada… Wait, wasn't he gonna let me out tonight? Hadn't he humiliated me enough?

"N-Nnoitra-sama? What are you doing?" a little bit of my panic crept into my voice.

"It's ten-o-clock at night." He answered. "I'm tired from hauling your whiny bitch ass around all day. I'm going ta bed!"

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand… what about me?" Little red lights were going off in my head.

"Well obviously I can't leave you alone can I? You can't do anything like this… So, you're comin with!"

"WHAT!"

Much screaming, swearing, struggling, bitching, and finally whining later, I was exhausted. There was nothing I could do. I was staying with Nnoitra until he decided to let me out.

When we reached his room, I stared at I like it was my execution chamber. This was it. If I stayed there tonight, it was official that I could in fact live in the net. I didn't wanna live in the net dammit! There were those marks on my back that you get from sitting on something to long, and I had really bad rope burn on my hands from gripping the net when Nnoitra swung me around. I was sore and stiff and humiliated. I didn't know how much more of this I could take.

Sighing, I gave up and went limp, allowing myself to be swung into his room. I had to admit, even though I saw it a lot, both as his fraccion and his personal pranker, Nnoitra's room never got any less awesome. I mean he was way tall right? So he has this oh my freakin Kami HUGE ass bed, and it's like, way soft and comfy, you almost sink into it and you just wanna flop down… (I found that out the time I put a whole litter of Szayel's latest creation under his blankets. I never found out what they were, but they looked like a cross between hollows, dogs, and worms…) Anyway, he also had these really nifty hook things he hung his bladey scythe things on, and the walls were painted dark grey, and there was this thick red carpet on the floor, and the blankets on the bed were red. He had a table with two chairs too, also upholstered in red, and all the wood, like the doors, chairs and bed frame, was this dark reddish-black wood. Long paragraph short, it was pretty freakin badass, and even if I would never admit it to anyone, it was almost… tasteful. Who knew huh?  
But now there was one addition. There was a big-ass hook embedded in his ceiling. "Damn. You really did think this out…" I commented. Nnoitra hung me on the hook. "Paybacks a bitch, bitch!" he cackled.

I sighed again and did my best to get comfortable on the wide squares of rope I was perched on. This was NOT going to be easy. I wasn't the most compact of sleepers. Sprawler might be more accurate. Bed-hog maybe.

"Nnoitraaaaa..." I whined. I looked at him and froze. He was shirtless, and from the looks of it he had just got done changing into a pair of long black pajama pants. Changing. With me _right there_ in the room.

My eyes were probably wide as the sun, and I know my mouth had fallen open. He looked up when I whined, and noticed me staring. He broke into yet another grin. "S'matter? See something you like?"

My eyes traveled up and down. I couldn't help it. Lean muscled torso... long legs... Just the right amount of muscle everywhere it mattered... Hell, I was seeing a _lot _I liked, but there was no way I was gonna admit that to him! I snapped my mouth shut and shot him a look that I swear to Kami had him cringing. "You wish I did!" I snapped, "Have some decency! I don't need to be scarred for life along with the rest of this bullshit!"

Nnoitra's P.O.V.

"Nnoitraaa..." Mari whined. I shut the drawer to my dresser and tossed my espada jacket into a corner before I turned. I braced myself for more bitching. I didn't get the reaction I was expecting though. Instead I was met with the most... hell, I don't even know how to describe the look on her face. It was priceless. Her eyes were huge, and her mouth was stretched into a big '0'. And her eyes... they were obviously traveling up and down my body, the look in their emerald depths a mixture of shock, awe, and... Hell, was that _desire_?

Before I could stop myself, I felt my face stretch into one of my trademark grins, "S'matter? See something you like?" I leered. I could've kicked myself. A wall slammed down over her face, and her eyes filled with rage and... Fear? "You wish I did!" she spat, "Have some decency! I don't need to be scarred for life along with the rest of this bullshit!"

I blinked, grin long gone. What the hell was her problem? Sure I didn't usually hit on her like every other girl in the world, but that didn't mean she got to react like this the one time I did! "Chill bitch!" My voice sounded way too defensive for my liking, but _damn_, right now the snarl on her face was _scary!_

"Keep this up and you ain't never getting outta that net!" I growled. Immediately the snarl disappeared and she turn away to face the wall once more. "Yes Nnoitra-sama..." she said quietly. I blinked again. Wow. She really did hate the net didn't she? Grumbling, I reached out and hit the lights, then stalked over to my bed. I flopped down and rolled to face away from her.

I made a point of ignoring the rustling, cursing, and occasional hiss of pain that came from Mari's direction. Damn it! I did not feel _guilty_! The bitch needed to be put in her place. Taught to fear me and treat me with respect like a proper fraccion should! I already made exceptions for her. I didn't hit on her, I didn't hurt her, I didn't abuse her or take advantage of her! Me being who I am, she was treated _damn_ good. But no, she just had to keep pushing me, with the pranks, the disrespect, the cursing, the flaunting how fuckin cute she was-

I froze, even stopped breathing. I didn't just think that. I didn't. Kami now the bitch was messing with my fucking head! No no no no no...

Unbidden, before I could stop it, my mind flashed back to a thousand moments spent with Mari...

Mari, streaked with sweat and blood and panting as our swords met yet again, war-whooping as she bounced back across the sparring field…

Mari, in an over-sized T-shirt down to her knees, answering the door with her bright red hair mussed and her shell-pink lips stretched into an adorable yawn...

Mari, Blood lust in her eyes as she let out a battle cry, twisting to strike down a hollow with unparalleled grace...

Mari, dropping from the ceiling to land on Tesla's head, laughing as he swore…

Mari, running for her life and giggling like a school-girl as I chased her down the hall, eyes flashing and long hair streaming out behind her...

Mari, tackling Tesla and sitting on his chest as she chugged the coffee he had been holding moments before...

Mari, Drunk as a frat boy and sitting on my shoulders, singing raucously as I try to claw her off...

Mari, sleeping sprawled across her bed, head tucked into her arms and muttering while she slept...

Mari.

Mari Mari Mari...

DAMN IT! Why was I smiling? What was wrong with me? I scowled and buried my face in the pillows. This couldn't go on. Once I put the bitch in her place I was gonna start keeping her far far away from me...

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Kagome: YAYZ! My first chapter of my first story! Dont put too much stock in the fact that it's Nnoitra. My Fave is actually Ulquiorra, but my laptop died and so did the documents that had his story, Grimmjow's story, and part of Sesshomaru's... sigh... Anyway! Message, review, whatever, all criticisms or praise welcome! More is to come, but this fic is gonna be 5 chaps max, unless you guys like, BEG me to write more, with I dont see happening...


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Nnoitras P.O.V.

I groaned and sat up as a light tap sounded through the door. "What?" I moaned. I had not slept well at _all _last night. Mari kept whimpering and mumbling in her sleep. She sounded so damn miserable... DAMN IT! I did _not _feel guilty! She was getting what she deserved, she have to deal with the consequences.

Tesla walked in, carrying two cups of what smelled like coffee. He took a sip of one as he looked around, stopping right under Mari. "Good morning Nnoitra-sama." he said. I stretched and grumbled, "What's good about it..."

Tesla looked around the room again. "Where's...?" he trailed off when Mari yawned above him and attempted to roll over. He looked up. "Ah, there she is." He lifted the untouched coffee towards her and waved it. Her eyes snapped open. "Coffee..." she mumbled. She reached for the cup sleepily, "Can't... reach..." she waved her arm toward it. "Teslaaaaa..." she whined, "Why are you so far away?"

I snickered and got up, walking over to them. Tesla was on his tiptoes trying to get the cup to her. I crossed my arms and looked at Mari. She looked so damn pathetic before her coffee, and the fetal position the net had forced her to sleep in wasn't helping. I debated torture. After two years I knew most of her quirks. I was well aware that she was incapable of normal function without coffee. If the girl had a weakness, this was it. Oh, did I want to torture her, but this probably wasn't worth it. For all I knew, she was so dependent on the stuff she could slip into a coma from deprivation, and even if she didn't when she finally got her hands on some, I was a dead man, net or no.

Sighing, I snatched the cup from Tesla and shoved it into the searching hand. She got the most beatific smile on her face when she got ahold of it. "Oh my kami Nnoitra, I love you so much right now!" she squealed. If you can squeal sleepily... well, if you can, she did it! I cringed at her words. Man. I almost never saw her pre-coffee. I guess there was a reason for that.

"Pathetic bitch." I muttered as I stalked to the shower.

Mari's P.O.V.

The moment that cup touched my hand I swear to Kami I would have professed my undying love to the sereitei Captain-Commander if he had been the one to hand it to me, and I'm sure Nnoitra knew that... right? Still, once the coffee was safely in my belly and the caffeine was bubbling its way up to my brain, I cringed. I really hoped that didn't come back to bite me...

I looked down at Tesla and tossed him the cup, beginning the process of unlocking my stiff and rope-burned muscles. "Thanks for that," I said with feeling, "If ANY day requires coffee, it's gonna be this one." I tried to sound joking, but I could tell Tesla was worried.

"Were you in there all night?" he asked. I managed to sit up, muscles screaming in protest. "Yup." I rolled my shoulders, hearing the joints pop. I giggled as I smirked as I saw Tesla's eye twitch. He was one of those people that can't stand the sound of bones popping. I stretched my arms over my head, "And all yesterday."

Tesla sighed, "I wondered what the giant hook was for, but this? What did you do this time?" I twisted at the waist: It sounded like someone was going over bubble wrap with a rolling pin as my vertebrae clicked back into their proper places.

"Um, I think everything!" I grinned.

Day 4 (Mari's pov)

I woke up but didn't open my eyes. I reached out for the coffee somewhere in the vicinity. I knew it was there. I could sense it. When it didn't magically appear in my hand, I waved a bit and grunted. I felt warmth in my palm. Bingo. I still didn't open my eyes as I pulled the cup through the net and brought it to my lips. I moved as little as possible. It was going to hurt when I moved and I wanted to put it off... I had been banged against the wall more times than I could count the last couple days, Nnoitra's new and more convenient version of punishment.

Believe it or not though, there must have been a small shred of mercy in Nnoitras evil bloodthirsty little heart. He had gotten sick of Tesla coming in with coffee every morning, (like he'd done for me for years! I have such a great friend) so he'd moved my coffee maker into the room, where it sat on its own little table, and it automatically made my coffee every morning, thanks to the nifty little timer it had. I got fresh coffee hand deliver to me by Nnoitra first thing every morning.

"I swear bitch," I heard Nnoitra say as I chugged, "That's nets makin you lazy!" I sighed and opened my eyes, turning my neck and nothing else as I turned to give him my best death glare. "Then let me out and I'll go jump on a treadmill." I growled. Nnoitra grinned, "Nope, not till you're sorry."

"For WHAT?"

"For your insubordination."

"Oh HELLS to the noes!"

He cackles as he heads to the bathroom.

Day 7 (Mari's pov)

I sighed, resting my head on my hand, my arm hooked to the net by the spikes on my mask/bracers. (See authors note for explanation) Life had sucked this week. My high point was quickly becoming the brief moment in the morning when I woke up to the smell of coffee and for just a moment thought I was in my own bed. Thanks to the aches in my back and the rope burns everywhere else, that moment got shorter every day. Most of my body was black and blue I was sure; I was beginning to hate the sight of a wall.

Worst of all, I had stopped getting jokes and snickers from the people we passed in the halls. Now I got looks of pity. I hated pity. Or worse, the few times I'd seen my friend Szayel, he had glared daggers at Nnoitra and started muttering about poisons. Yeah I knew I must have been a mess.

That was the problem. It wasn't the pain or discomfort that got to me. Hell no. I was Nnoitra's Fraccion, and on top of that, his favorite sparring buddy. I knew pain. No, it was the lack of privacy. I hadn't had a single _moment_ to myself since I had dyed Nnoitra's hair orange. And guess what? No privacy meant no showers.

Yep, I had been strung up in a net for a week, hadn't been fully upright, slept properly, or gone anywhere voluntarily. I was black and blue and my rope burns were starting to ooze clear stuff, but all I wanted was a shower. Hey, I had two comforts in life, hot showers and coffee. Nnoitra was smart enough not to mess with the coffee, but showers...

Nnoitra loved my misery. Oh I had bitched up a storm. No, I'd bitched up a natural disaster, but he didn't care. It was more reason to be sorry. Besides, there was no way for me to _get _a shower. Not without getting out of the net, or letting me touch the ground, which would've let me out anyway.

I sighed again, switching hands. We were walking down the hall. Well. Nnoitra was walking. I kind of bobbed. Suddenly I heard lots of cursing and swearing. I looked up as a sopping wet Grimmjow rounded the corner. I snickered, "What happened to you?" I called. He looked over at me. "It's raining in the human world." he complained, "I _hate_ water..." he muttered as he stormed off.

Nnoitra stopped walking. "Hey Mari," He asked casually, "You still want a shower?" I whipped around to face him, eyes sparkling.

*20 minutes later*

I glared at Nnoitra from under my dripping hair, swinging in the wind from the worst storm I'd ever seen. Not that I'd seen a lot of storms, but still. I hung from a streetlight, while Nnoitra stood a couple yards from me, warm and dry under a gazebo, arms crossed and laughing his ass off.

"You sorry yet bitch?"

"NEVER!"

**Kagome: K! The authors note! Yeah, I just realized, I never did give you guys a description of Mari did I? Well I should then. She has long Red hair down to her waist, like, legitimately RED, not the orange color people in the real world call read hair. She has huge bright green eyes, like an emerald color, and bronze skin. Not like, Hispanic bronze, but a healthy, I-live-my-life-in-the-sun kind of bronze. She wears white pants with black trim in a kind of cargo style, not hakema, but baggy with pockets. She wears a black tank-top that shows of her arms, and it's low-cut without being slutty. Oh, and those spiked mask/bracer things? Those are Mari's mask remains. They form bracers from her elbow to her wrist on both arms, and they have spikes she can extend and retract, like a switch blade. I'll tell you a secret, her animal, like, y'know what kind of hollow she was? She was a T-rex! Yeah, I got this thought like how cool would a dinosaur arrancar would be, and I HAD to do it! Yeah, the spikes are the remnants of the teeth, so picture it like 3 dinosaur teeth comin out of it. **


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Day 12 (Mari's pov)

I swung lazily from the post, sighing happily as the simulated breeze tickled my cheeks. Hell, who cared if it was simulated, when you were as miserable as me, anything that felt good was a blessing. I kicked myself back into what I hoped at least looked like a relaxed position. I had decided that Nnoitra didn't need to know how much pain I was in. Hell, it'd probably make him happier.

_Speaking of Nnoitra_, I thought... I directed my attention to the sandy field where Nnoitra and Tesla were. Currently, Nnoitra was engaged in his favorite pastime of beating on the weak. Well, weak to him, and who wasn't? He was the freaking 5th espada! Tesla didn't have a shot in hell against Nnoitra, but since I wasn't really in a position to spar... yeah.

I watched Tesla fall as Nnoitra leg swept him with the handle of his scythe. Shit.

"Hey Nnoitra!" I sang, "You're getting sloppy!" Nnoitra turned to glare at me from across the field. Kami damn it he looked good... All blood spattered, hair blowing in the wind, and... _Damn_. Was he breathing a little heavy? Oh _yeah_... Wait, OH _NO_! "Damn it!" I muttered. How could he keep doing this shit to me and have me _still _love him? There was something wrong with me, that's what it was.

Tesla took his chance to scramble up, and I sighed in relief. Not only was Tesla going to be okay, but Nnoitra would get to work off more energy, which ultimately resulted in less pain for me. Yeah, I'm a selfish pig. So what?

"C'mon you wuss!" I called, "Me being in the nets bad for both of us! I can't remember the last time I saw you fight this bad!" okay, so his fighting was as great as ever, but pissing him off made him leave openings. I wanted to make it as easy on Tesla as I could seeing as his predicament was kinda my fault... Okay, and yeah, it was fun.

"That's it!" Nnoitra slammed his scythe into the ground so hard it buried into the dirt, and began striding toward me, "You need to learn when to shut up bitch!" I giggled. Kami I was so freaking dead. I grinned at Nnoitra like a cocky bitch while I mentally kicked myself. Nnoitra was almost there, I braced for the wall-slamming sure to co-

"Nnoitra-sama."

A soft voice made us both freeze in our tracks. We looked toward the voice, me with relief, and him with... well, his annoying mixture of pissed-offness and sexist pigness. The small goat-horned numero girl looked terrified as she faced down the most unstable of the espada. I didn't blame the poor thing.

"I'm busy!" Nnoitra snapped, "What do you want _girl_?" Man, I hated how he could make the word _girl _sound like the worst insult in the world. I rolled my eyes. What did I see in him again? He tossed his hair back from his eye as he waited impatiently for her to recover her tongue, I about drooled as the false sun glanced off it and he cocked one hip to the side, arms crossed in annoyance. Oh yeah. That's what. Damn it.

The numero was still struggling to get the words out past her trembling. "L-l-lord Aizen h-has called an esp-spada m-meeting s-sir." she managed. The poor thing looked like she was about to keel over. I sighed mentally. If she were smart she would've waited till Nnoitra took his anger out on me. Now she was stuck with the full force of his glare. Nnoitra groaned and put a hand to his forehead, tipping his head back, "Ugh, another?" The girl looked confused, "H-hai sir."

Nnoitra looked down at her. "What, you're still here? Scram!" The girl shrieked and scurried away, disappearing behind one of the red towers faster than I could blink. Nnoitra shook his head and groaned again, "Fuckin Aizen. Probably just wants another excuse to show off his god-awful tea collection!" He whined. I snickered, hiding my grin behind a bracer. Last time there was a meeting Nnoitra had been a little too sarcastic and Aizen had called his bluff. He had said _how much_ he just _loved _Aizens _wonderfu_l tea, and how he wished _he_ could be as cultured as Aizen himself. Nnoitra ended up having private tea with Aizen every day for a month.

I jerked back out of my happy thoughts as Nnoitra looked at me. "What the hell am I supposed to do with you?" He thought a moment. I gave him my patented you-are-a-dumbass look. "Hmmmm..." I mused, "I know! How about you let me out of the net!" I gave him an adorable aren't-I- so-smart -look. In case you can't tell, I'm the queen of looks. Nnoitra glared at me. "Nice try. I'll just have the numero install another hook outside the meeting room door."

I sighed. "C'mon!" I whined, "I've been in here for almost two weeks! What more do you want from me!" Nnoitra grinned. "I already told you, I want you to be sorry. The perfect little obedient subservient fraccion." I stared at him for a few second before laughing hysterically. "That just gets funnier every time!" Nnoitra glared and picked up my stick. He casually thunked me against the wall. "And THAT is why you're in the net!" he laughed. I hissed at him. He thunked me again.

xXxXxXx

"Mari." A whisper, and then something was pressed into my hand. I kept my eyes averted from Szayel; Nnoitra would get paranoid if he knew I was talking to him. He was convinced that Szayel was plotting something evil and devious to help me out and get back at him. Looks like he was right for once. "Take these, and we'll see if that moron doesn't get the hint." He whispered. I slipped the tiny pill bottle down my shirt *yeah let's hear it for built in pockets girls!* and managed to slump back and look bored before Nnoitra followed the rest of the espada out of the meeting. Later when Nnoitra turned his back, I popped one of the tiny red pills and smirked. Hell if I knew what they did, but knowing Szayel it'd be good.

Nnoitra's POV

I lay in bed that night, supremely pissed off. It had been nearly two weeks. TWO WEEKS! And still Mari refused to crack. She was miserable, I could tell that much. Whenever she though I wasn't looking she let the pain slip through and show. When I went to shower in the morning I could hear her joints pop even from the bathroom.

I guess it had been too much to hope for, that the pain would have taken care of it. Physical wasn't gonna cut it, not for Mari. I'd sure as hell never admit it out loud, but Mari is one of the toughest people I know. She doesn't whine and complain and bitch and moan like other fraccion.

Well.

She does, but it's more about what an ass I am then about her pain. She didn't care about that, she just cared that I'm a quote 'chauvinistic sadistic sexist man-bear-pig wannabe badass with no fashion sense no brains and a superiority complex bigger than Szayels.' I had to admit, that last bit hurt. I did so have fashion sense! And it's not my fault I have a huge-ass hole in my head! And how DARE that bitch compare to Pinky!

I cast a glance over towards the dark shape suspended from my ceiling. I could hear Mari's soft breathing, even from across the room. She was hunched over, her arms crossed and held against her chest, and her feet stuck through the netting. A bit of moonlight came in through the one window, and of course it just so happened to fall across her face. A lock of her hair had fallen between her eyes, and it glowed fiery red against the paleness of her skin.

As I watched, her face twisted in pain and she tried to roll over. Of course with her legs stuck through the net like they were, that didn't really work and she ended up tangled in the net, rolled up like sushi. I snickered. She groaned and her eyes opened. She blinked a couple times and tried to stretch, then her face darkened and she swore as she realized her predicament. Muttering to herself she tried to get untangled, but her arms had gotten pinned to her side and she couldn't move a muscle. She wriggled a bit, but the net just swung back and forth. She turned even paler and moaned, "Ohhh, bad idea, bad idea... quit moving quit moving quit-AH! U-urgh! Dizzy..." Her eyes closed and she looked like she was trying not to puke.

I covered my mouth with my arm and tried to hide my laughter. She was _net_-sick. This was great! I couldn't help laughing. Mari's eyes snapped back open and she glared. No, glared isn't a strong enough word. Let's just say that if looks could bring physical pain, I would have been maimed, tortured, and eviscerated.

I just laughed louder. "Nnoitra!" she snapped, "You son-of-a..." she sighed and trailed off, hanging her head. "Nnoitra..." It was almost a mumble, and I stopped laughing so I cold stare at her. "Nnoitra... *sigh* C-could you maybe..." was she asking me for HELP? Oh wow, she was miserable. Still, I had to get something out of this. "Could I what?" I leered. She raised her head and looked at me.

"C-could you... could you help me?" She said defiantly. My eyes widened. She cast her gaze of somewhere to the side of me, and I could see how dearly it had cost her to say that. Sighing I balled up the covers and tossed them off, groaning as I stood up. "Whatever." I muttered, "But just so I don't have to hear your bitchin'."

She stared pointedly over my shoulder as I rolled her over and began untangling her, didn't even say thank you, ungrateful bitch she was. Just muttered under her breath low-enough I couldn't catch what she said. I gripped her wrist so I could shove her arm through the net, then hissed and pushed her away as pain shot up my arm. "What the hell bitch!" I shouted.

Mari blinked and looked back at me "Huh?"

I glared at her, "Don't say 'huh!' Tell me what the hell you just did!"

"I didn't do anything!"

"Then what the hell was that?"

"I don't know!"

"YES YOU DO!"

"NO I DON'T!"

"WELL IF YOU DIDN"T DO IT WHO DID!"

"DID WHAT?"

I huffed and sat back on the bed, still glaring. "Bitch" I muttered. "Bastard" she mumbled. I couldn't understand it. When I touched her... I raised my hand to my face and stared at it. It had to be a fluke. Growling I shot up and grabbed her wrist again, ignoring her squawk of protest. "AHH!" I dropped her hand again immediately, "WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?"

Mari blinked at me. "What is _what_?"

**Author note: OMG I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO sorry it took this long. But Ima use my standard excuse and blame it on the horrid horrid Mac I'm forced to use since my poor baby died. It has no word documents! I have to write it on Google docs then find another computer to load it up on! GAHH! Anyways. I'm currently looking for a beta, cuz in case you can't tell I suck at editing my own stories... *sweatdrop***

**Comment responses:**

**XxSasuxX~ Haha soooooo glad you like it! And all the other reader-peoples can thank you cuz it was your comment that made me get my rear in gear and write this! This is my first full length fic and I'm thinkin I bit off a bit more than I can chew... It was actually supposed to be a one-shot anyway!**

**Mana Demonica~ You know what I did when I read your review? I turned around and rubbed it in MY friends face that I wasn't the only one who liked 'Noitra! actually if you want a really good NnoitraXoc fic, ****Liquor and women dont mix**** by Sarahbeth24 is my total favorite in all of fanfictiondom! That is, if you dont mind excesive smut. ALL her stuff is packed with smutty goodness.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Omg I am sooooooooo sorry people! It's been months hasn't it? Well guess what, it's partially your own fault. Reviews give me motivation! And no one reviews! So seriously, review, or this suckers just not getting finished. And that would suck, because there's not gonna be more than two chapters after this one. So Nyah. Your loss! **

**So anyway, review, I want at least five before I give you the next chapter! Take a moment right now; does the little blue review number say twelve? *Gasp* It doesn't? THEN REVIEW! **

**Oh btw, I warn you, this chapter is soooo bipolar, it goes from dark to bouncy to dark to funny to just plain random. Consider yourself warned.**

**Disclaimer: Yeah, I just realized I've been kinda spotty on the disclaimers huh? I don't own anyone or anything but Mari okay? It'd be nice but if I did the whole anime would just be yaoi and fluff and Orihime's blood smeared on the walls. (Ulquiorra stealing whore…) Yeah. So. On with it!**

Chapter four

**Mari's P.O.V.**

Nnoitra stared at me. Well, no, he glared. Really scary like. Seriously, what was going on? I sat up in the net, now untangled.

"Okay, let's go through this slow: _What. The. Fuck. Are. You. Talking about_?" I glared right back at him. "One minute you were fine and the next you're jumping around like you've been elec …trocuted…" oh shit. Something loose in my head thunked into place, and it all slammed into me. The pills Szayel had given me. Shit shit SHIT!

Nnoitra's already narrow eyes thinned even more.

"You really don't know what's going on." It wasn't a question, and his voice had changed from shock and anger. His voice was low and menacing. I nodded mutely, acutely aware of the pill bottle stashed in my tank top. He took a step closer to me.

"You're _positive_?" He hissed.

Shit. He was in bloodlust mode. I wasn't coming out of this alive, I was sure of it. Unconsciously my hand had strayed to the strap of my top, nervously tugging on the material. Again, I nodded.

It was an incredibly stupid move. Nnoitra's eyes flicked to my chest, widening, and before I could stop him he had unhooked the net and dumped me out of it. I hit the floor hard, rolling to absorb the fall as my arrancar ninja battle skills kicked in. Before I could even register my freedom he had swept in and picked me up by the ankle, making sure he kept the cloth of my pants between his hand and my skin. I squeaked as the ground disappeared from me once more.

Nnoitra raised me with one arm so I was staring into his upside-down face, just inches away from him. My breath came quick and shallow. He looked oddly calm now. That was bad. Nnoitra didn't do calm. It wasn't in his programming. It just didn't happen!

"What did he do?" He asked. His voice was almost pleasant, polite. I whimpered. The one time it would've have been great for Nnoitra to stick to his all brawn and no brains routine, he had to start being a genius. He knew it was Szayel, that much was obvious. That was the problem with Nnoitra. He could be incredibly intelligent when it suited his purposes. Yet another reason I had chosen to be his fraccion, I knew he was smart. I could never get bored around him, when there was always more to him I was figuring out.

I groaned and covered my face with my hands. Here I was totally at his mercy, and I was admiring the traits he was gonna use to kill me. Wow. This was pathetic. I wasn't even thinking of ways to get out of this!

Oh wait. Ways to get out of this… The pills! There we go!

**Nnoitra's P.O.V.**

"Mamph mm mph napht, mphd mnd mm msk oo mm mmmm!" Mari said. I raised my visible eyebrow.

"Speak up girl, I can't hear you. _What did he do_?" I yelled.

She uncovered her face and looked at me, "Eat my face last, and send my mask to my mama!" She whimpered. I blinked. Son of a bitch, she was cracking jokes. What the hell was wrong with her? Angrily, I shook her back and forth.

"Tell me what he gave you!" I roared. And a little bottle fell out of her shirt and onto the floor, the pills inside rattling loudly. I froze stunned, and that was all the time she needed. Her hand came up and smacked me in the face. The shock that I now knew came from the pills sparked into me and I dropped her, clapping a hand to my cheek.

**Mari's P.O.V.**

Nnoitra dropped me when I touched him, and I whooped and hit the floor in a crouch, snatching up the pill bottle and making a dash for the door. Before Nnoitra could recover, I was out the door and dashing down the hall. My joy was short-lived though, my legs were incredibly stiff from their time in the net. While I was still way above human speed, I was slow for me, and definitely slow to Nnoitra.

Closed my eyes, I melted into a sonido. Now I dashed at super-sonic speeds. Despite being able to hear Nnoitra right behind me (damn he recovers quickly) this was a beautiful moment for me. It felt so good to be running again, my legs stretching and propelling me forward, the air whipping past me… I lost myself for just a second….But Szayels lab door appeared in front of me, and I dashed inside and slammed the door behind me. I took just enough time to giggle as I heard Nnoitra slam into it, and then I was off again, dashing and weaving between beakers and Bunsen burners and creepy things suspended in unknown liquids. Reaching the very back of the lab I entered the familiar pink door that led to Szayels private quarters, eyes widening as I heard a crash behind me. I slammed that door too, and dashed through the annoyingly feminine furniture to the open door of Szayels bedroom.

"Hey Szayel!" I chirped, as said pinkette shot up at my rude entry. "I'm gonna bunk here for a few kay?" I dived under his bed before he could even register my words, and just as my foot disappeared beneath the bed skirt, I heard the door fly open again.

**Nnoitra's P.O.V.**

With a growl I stepped into the room and began scanning the room for my little escapee. "Now I've got… Aw hell! Now where the fuck is she?" I moaned. I was sick of this. I'll admit it. I wasn't pissed at her. I was pissed at Szayel. Szayel. Well, speak of the devil, I was in his room wasn't I? With a leer I turned to face him. Szayel was glaring at me with all the prissiness of a PMSing woman kept from her chocolate.

"Ooh," I grinned, "Scary!"

With a very put-upon sigh Szayel slid out from beneath the covers, His pink-silk pajamas mussed and his hair a mess. I gave a nasty smirk.

"Good morning sleeping beauty. Care to explain what the hell you did?" I kept my voice low and menacing, the same one I had used on Mari not five minutes ago.

"Why me…" he muttered. "My dear Mari-chan?" He raised his voice, "What on earth has possessed you? It's two in the morning!" A disembodied giggle floated out from somewhere in the room, but I couldn't tell where it came from.

"_Sorry Szayel-sama, but those shocky pill things you gave me kicked in at a bad time_." She laughed.

I growled. "Mari! Get your sorry ass out from wherever the hell you are!" It bothered me to be addressing the ceiling, but where the hell was she?

"_Never! I value my life and sanity thank you very much!"_

My retort was cut off by a heavy sigh. Szayel sat back down on his prissy silk duvet, crossing first his arms and then his legs neatly at the ankles. I fought the urge to retch.

"Mari –chan, I think your sanity is safe in its grave right now, don't worry." Szayel laughed.

"_Uh! Are you calling me insane_?"

"Your _Nnoitras _fraccion. Need I say more?" Szayel shot a smug glance at me.

"Mari!" I yelled, "What the hell is wrong with you? You know I'll find you eventually, you're my fraccion, and you're stuck with me!"

There was a pause that seemed to last forever.

"_Maybe I don't wanna be you're fraccion anymore… I don't need this you ass_…" Her voice sounded strange and quiet all the sudden, like she was choking. She should've been screaming at me. I blinked and looked at Szayel. His eyes had grown huge and round behind his glasses. He looked as though he had just been hit over the head.

"Oh Mari-chan… " He shook his head, and pinched the bridge of his nose, "Don't tell me you've actually fal-"

"_DON'T!_" Mari shrieked suddenly, "_Don't you dare_!"

"What?" I said, "What's she done?"

Szayel smirked at me, "I can't believe I didn't see it before. Mari-chan, you're a fool. I hope you know that. I have to say though, when you think about it it's perfect. You're so exactly the same." He laughed.

Mari heaved a huge sigh. "_I don't suppose you have a pill to fix this_?"

Szayel laughed again, "If only!"

I'd had it. I wasn't understanding a word of their conversation, but I had a feeling it involved me. I couldn't tell if it was insulting or not either. "Alright bitch, I have no idea what you two are talking about, but I've had enough of this. Where the fuck are you?" I shot over to Szayels wardrobe and opened it. No Mari. The closet. No Mari. I tore around the room turning things upside down trying to find her. Szayel shrieked at me like some prissy girl the whole time, I was making a huge mess, but I ignored him. I wasn't going to sit here and take this. Mari had _chosen_ to be my fraccion, this was her own fault if she wasn't happy! She didn't have to stay with me!

I stalked toward the bed, but as I lifted Szayels girly golden bed skirt, a red and white blur shot out the other side, and ran for the door. I blinked. All I could think was

"Did she seriously hide under your bed?" I asked Szayel.

He facepalmed. "Yes." He walked over to me and spun me around pushing me toward the door. I was still too shocked to resist him, my mind trying to sort through Mari and Szayel's conversation. _Did she really not want to be my fraccion anymore?_ "And I suggest you go catch her before it's too late. Good luck Romeo." And he slammed the door in my face.

I stared at the door. _Romeo?_

xXxXxXx

**Kagome: Well, I hope you enjoyed. R&R dammit! I tried to make this extra long to make up, it was 8 pages as a word document so…. Anyway, I got a new laptop FINALLY! (Its razzberry colored! And SPARKLY! Yay! Suck it guy-in-my-class-who-rubbed-in-the-fact-that-he-had-a-laptop-when-I-didn't!) So I'll be able to update regularly now, since I have a place to store my documents!**

I actually had this done days ago, but my beta never responded T_T and NO I'm not playing 'blame the beta' I know it's my fault, but I'm just sayin…

**Comment responses:**

amber-was-here130 ~ I'm sorry! T_T yes it is cruel and unusual punishment to have to wait. I feel like such a hypocrite cuz I'm the least patient person EVER! But she did get out of the net, so rest easy.


	5. Chapter 5 the search for romeo

Huzzah! Chapter five, and officially the longest fic I've ever written. I'm kinda proud of me y'know? It's amazing you people got this much outta me, but SOME PEOPLE *coughXxSasuxXcough* won't leave me in peace till I finish! T_T Lol I'm just kidding. A huge Thanks to XxSasuxX for kickin me in the rear till I got this out. ^ ^

Oh btw! I'm introducing a new oc in this one! There's gonna be maybe 5 major oc's in Hueco Mundo okay? That's total in all my stories. But they won't all show up in this story. This one is Gins sexxi lover alright? Be warned, she's slightly psycho. Of course that the point. But still. She's an expert in the field of mindfucking.

* * *

Chapter 5

**Mari's P.O.V.**

Panting I skidded to a stop in front of the door to my quarters. It had been weeks since I'd been there, and in the dog eat dog, cat eat cat, fish eat fish world of Hueco Mundo, and there was a very good chance it had been taken over. I had a room befitting my station as a fraccion, with a window and southern lighting, and my own bathroom, an almost unheard-of luxury here. _Yeah, _I thought, _there's no way in hell it's still free. _

Dreading what I would find, I slowly turned the knob and opened the door. As long as it wasn't Loly and Menoly, those kiss-ass whores, I would survive. And kick them out. I wasn't gonna stand for-

"OH MY GOD!" I screeched, "MY EYES!" It was _horrible_! Pink walls with gaudy purple and yellow flowers stenciled on. A pink-flowered bedspread. A soft cream-colored carpet. And a beefy man with long curly hair, huge poufy lips, waaaaaay too much mascara, and wardrobe issues. I swear to Aizen, big beefy black man, in a skirt and belly-top.

"AHHHH! He screeched, "Don't you know it's rude to enter a lady's room without permission?" I stared at him, eye twitching.

"L-lady?" I managed. Without another word I turned and shut the door, the soft click seeming to me not to leave it there with that freak. Yeah, kicking the cross-dresser out of my room just wasn't worth it. I have a strong belief in choosing your battles. Spinning on my heel I turned and shot back off down the corridor, my brain already blocking my traumatic experience. I didn't have time to sit and freak out properly. With any luck Szayel would have distracted Nnoitra for a bit, but the spoon was bound to be here soon. I needed a place to hide, but _where_…

**Nnoitra's P.O.V.**

I walked slowly through the corridors of Los Noches, (kagome: HA! I typed lost nachos and had to go back and fix it XD I'm pathetic) completely ignoring everything around me. _What the hell is a Romeo?_ Of course, I'm sure Pinky knew I wouldn't know what it was. That's why he used the phrase. It sounded a bit like something from the human world. Was it an insult? Or a hint? Of course, it would have helped if I could've understood a word of what Mari and the pink-haired freak were talking about…

FLASHBACK! WHOO!

"_**Maybe I don't wanna be your fraccion anymore… I don't need this you ass…"**__ Her voice sounded strange and quiet all the sudden, like she was choking. She should've been screaming at me. I blinked and looked at Szayel. His eyes had grown huge and round behind his glasses. He looked as though he had just been hit over the head._

"_Oh Mari-chan… " He shook his head, and pinched the bridge of his nose, "Don't tell me you've actually fal-"_

"_**DON'T!"**__ Mari shrieked suddenly, __**"Don't you dare!"**_

BACK TO THE FUTURE!

I groaned and smacked myself in the forehead. _What had she been about to say?_ This was punishment of the worst kind. _What did she mean? AND WHAT THE FUCK WAS A ROMEO?_

"Romeo was a fictional character from an earth play. He was the main character. In Romeo and Juliet, the kids 'a two feudin' families fell in love without their parent's knowledge, and got hitched. 'Ventually the parents tried to force the girl Juliet to tie the knot wi' somun' else, and she faked 'er death to be with Romeo instead. 'Cept Romeo actually thought she died. So he killed 'imself so he could be with her. And then JULIET found out 'e was dead, and killed 'erself. Buh' for real that time. It was'n a very happy story."

I froze and turned around slowly. Floating in the air upside-down, two inches from my face was Lii Tai, the most fucked up bitch in all of history. I shivered as I stared into her eyes. She had fucked up eyes to go with the rest of her. The white parts of them weren't white; they were pitch black, with electric purple irises and no pupils. I always thought she looked like some screwed up alien, but I was always too afraid to tell her so. That's right, afraid. This bitch freaked me out.

With barely a sound, and a swish of purple ponytail, Lii Tai righted herself and touched back down to the ground. She clasped her hands behind her back and leaned forward.

"What'sa matta Nnoitra-kun? Grimmjow gotcher tongue?" she giggled. I took a step back.

"Wha…. What was that you said, about Romeo? He was a person?" I managed. I didn't bother asking how she knew what I was thinking. That was the other creepy thing about her, aside from the eyes. The bitch could read minds. Everything I thought or felt was open to her. She could find out all my deepest secrets with nothing more than a thought. If she were anyone else I would've killed her, but she was untouchable, Gin's little reject lover pet.

She leaned back precariously and looked at me, cocking her head at an unnatural angle, almost upside-down, like some creepy alien owl. She studied me for what felt like an eternity, although it could only have been a few seconds. Finally, she leaned forward again, her neck moving back to a human pose with a sickening pop.

"When Szayel called you Romeo, he was implying that you were the Romeo in the story, and Mari was the Juliet. He means that you two are star-crossed lovers that are meant for each other." She said. I blinked at her, realizing she'd dropped her ridiculous speech pattern so I could take her seriously. She pulled her ponytail over her shoulder and began to study the strands, as if we were discussing the weather, and nothing more serious. "And just so you know," She continued, still not looking up, "Mari's completely in love with you. You're a bigger fool than I thought if you can't see it." And without missing a beat she turned around and walked off down the hall, turning a corner and disappearing from sight. I stared after her. 1…2…3…

"WHAT THE HELL?"

It all fell into place, like a brick falling on my head, and I could practically hear Szayel finishing his sentence.

"_Mari, don't tell me you've actually fallen for him?"_

3rd P.O.V.

Lii Tai smiled as she pressed her back to the wall on the other side of the corner. Nnoitra thoughts were bubbling over like mentos and diet Coke.

"_She LOVES me? Hell no! She hates my guts, she tells me so each and every day! She's disgusted by my fighting, by how I talk, by how I treat her and Tesla…."_

Lii stuck out one finger with a sly smile. First stage. Denial.

"_But then… there were all those times, when she'd look at me, and smile, and make jokes… and she never really complained unless I asked her to do something unreasonable…. Hell, she ASKED to be my fraccion, that's nuts! _

Two fingers. Second stage. Reasoning with yourself.

"_Wait, she asked to be my fraccion TWO YEARS AGO! Has she seriously felt like this for that long? That could be the only reason she did something so stupid! Has she been ogling me behind my back for that long? And I'm sure Tesla knows, and Lii Tai knew, and Szayel figured it out… AM I THE LAST ONE TO KNOW? HOW THE FUCK COULD SHE DO THIS TO ME? DID SHE WANT ME TO LOOK STUPID? WAS THAT IT?_

Third finger. Anger.

"_Wait, has she seriously been waiting all this time? Maybe she wanted me to figure it out. She sure didn't act like it! Man how could I have been so stupid… all this time and she must have felt like such an idiot. She must have been miserable…._

Four fingers. Guilt.

_But… why the hell am I being so soft about this? Ah what the hell should I DO? I sure as hell don't love her! The bitch drives me nuts! Always laughing at me, mocking me, disrespecting me! Always has to be all pathetic and whiny before she has her coffee, and sing and climb all over me when she's drunk! Hurts like hell when she pulls my hair… Always has to make fun of my spoo- HOOD! DAMMIT! HOOD! _

Lii Tai choked from trying not to laugh, and covered her mouth with her free hand to keep Nnoitra from hearing her.

_And why the hell does she always try and protect Tesla when we're sparring? Does she think I don't know what she's doing? Tesla doesn't NEED protecting! If anyone does it's her! How many times have I had to pull her ass out of the fire when she pisses off the wrong person? And half the time she doesn't even know I'm having to do it! _

Lii Tai smiled as the clicking of boots, back and forth, signified Nnoitra starting to pace.

_And what the hell's with her making fun of my wardrobe? The way that bitch dresses, like a mixture of tomboy and slut, who does she think she is? A spoon hood isn't anything next to that! It's like she wears those fuckin tank-tops on purpose, like she's daring you to stare at her tits. Well guess what? I DON'T CARE! I don't care if she has great tits, or a great ass, or a pretty face and long hair and a sexy-ass body! She thinks she's so great because she can calm me down when I'm about to kill someone, thinks she's just so irresistible! It'd be better if she were like those bitches that follow Aizen everywhere, the ones who say how beautiful and perfect they are, who think they're too good for me. Why the hell can't Mari be like that? At least then I'd know what she's thinking! __**And if I knew what she's thinking, I WOULDN'T BE IN THIS MESS**__!_

Lii Tai winced as his thoughts reached a roar. The noise felt like it was going to split her skull. Szayel owed her huge for this, she would have to stay by Gin the whole day tomorrow and let her mind rest. He was taking forever, when was he going to figure it out? He'd had _two years_, and now she had practically shoved his face into his feelings, and he still couldn't-

_DAMN IT! It shouldn't be this hard! All I have to do is tell her I know, and reject her right? Problem solved! I don't need to feel bad about crushing the feelings of my own insubordinate fraccion!_

Lii Tai jerked away from the hall with a gasp. This wasn't how this was supposed to go! Where was stage five? WHERE WAS IT? She peeped around the corner just in time to see Nnoitra storming off down the hall in the opposite direction.

* * *

**Kagome: GASP! OH NOES! WHY NNOITRA! *Nnoitra walks in and I start to assault him* YOU DUMBASS! Mari is way more important that you male pride you jerk-off! ToT WAHHH!**

**Okay, THIS IS NOT HOW I PLANNED IT! And yet this is how it came out, and I couldn't seem to write anything else! Sigh… I guess i'm just in a depressing mood. Oh well, I hope you liked it anyway?**


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